Early in my career when I traveled it was always amazing to meet people who grew up in big cities, with all kinds of things that I didn’t know about growing up. Coming from a small town I thought they were just the coolest, most savvy people ever.
Did I feel like I wasn’t as cool, as equipped to handle the big tasks, as “smart” as them? Sometimes I did. The thing is, we all doubt ourselves on occasion. It’s knowing that you are worthy and silencing the doubt and doubters.
Growing up, I would try anything my parents said I should do, even though I was kinda scared. I would step up and speak anywhere, even though I was kinda shy. I entered and placed in my high school’s beauty pageant, even though I was “the plus sized girl”. When given the chance to travel, I would go anywhere, because my youth was spent in such a small city.
Key point, invest time on making your inside as healthy as your outside. That is both mental and physical health. Being skinny is never the goal. But being healthy, active and happy should be great targets.
It never dawned on me “not to” go to the new place. Not to audition, not to ask for the opportunity, not to try. And not to keep trying again even if they said no.
No one should define what “your place” is, that includes those limiting thoughts that you may have for yourself. Think differently about boundaries. They aren’t to keep you bound, they are there to keep the wrong things from entering into your space.
That doesn’t mean that I got every opportunity. Some things I didn’t get to do. But, I never told myself no. Even if I only had a 1% chance, why be quiet and have 0%?
Many times people’s expectations for us, our responsibilities to things that may not be in our best interest, even family and friends can trap you into a life that is not supposed to be. Let the call from friend who may be a distraction, go to voicemail. Choose to actively do some of the things on your self-care to-do list. Help the people who love you, support you by handling some of their own situations without you. It can actually make them stronger too.
Sometimes, I had to fight for what I wanted. It never dawned on me to not do something because I was too afraid, too shy, too female, too black or too country. I refused to settle.
Have you ever had a person in your life that you lowered your standards for, just to make them feel comfortable? How did that end? More often than not, people who need help want to help from people who live the kind of life that they hope to live. By lowering yourself to “their level”, it’s way more likely that you will be the one left at that level, when they “upgrade”.
Instead, show them you at your best and how they can live life at their personal best too.
It wasn’t until I was older, did I connect the dots that the people I worked with in these far away places were all just like the amazing people I loved in my hometown. Some of them wanted to see more of the world, do more things and even create big things that changed the world.
Often those hopes had to be put in a back corner because they had to settle for taking a job to pay bills or not having the confidence to go out into the unknown, or just not believing that they had what it takes to overcome a huge change in their lifestyle.
Having connections with people who can help you win and those whom you can help win is vital to success. Being part of a high-value tribe of people with different strengths, resources and connections is key.
Who can mention your name in a group that could take you to the next level? Can you do the same?
Faith is an important part of that belief. Knowing that you were created for a reason and that you are part of something greater will change your perspective. It becomes your how.
When you realize that “You Were Created For This”, you’ll begin to see that there must be a plan. If there is a plan, it must be possible for you to do it.
I’m here to tell you that if you are reading this, you still have time to conquer that big thing that you’ve always wanted to do. Settling for just enough to get by strangles the free, limitless life that you know you should be living.
Hear some of the lessons I’ve learned in my free audio “How to Do Everything You Want”.
I’m sharing the real answers that have helped me and helped the countless leaders, business owners, and organizations that I’ve worked with. It’s not magic. It’s real actions that become part of your every day life. You Win!
-M
